Saturday, March 28, 2009

An incident of little importance

Let's take it from the beginning:

Trip out for groceries w/young son: 7:15pm

Purchase of crackers, tinned tomatoes, very lean ground beef and ground pork, firm tofu, some frozen fish and even more boring items: 7:45pm

Return home, park car: 8:05pm

Withdraw son, lock car, unnlock truck to fetch groceries: 8:06

Unpack groceries, load fridge, put boy to bed: 8:07pm - 8:45pm

Consider putting car in garage behind the house, but decide to wait until my wife gets back from her class: 8:46pm

Wife comes home: 9:15pm

I go out to the car, unlock it, get in: 9:18pm

I notice that the armrest is up, which is odd since I don't keep anything in it except for some parking change, which is still there: 9:19pm

I notice my leather coat and the cell phone in the inside pocket are gone: 9:19pm and 45 sec

Loud cursing and exclamations of disbelief: 9:20pm - pretty much until now, really.

All in all, I got off light. The phone (a hand-me-down Treo for anyone who cares) was handy but not beloved. There was nothing deeply personal on it other than a few phone numbers and a library of MP3s. The coat didn't hold any deeply sentimental attachment other than the fact it was a nice leather coat that I got cheap at an end-of-season sale a few years ago and was rather fond of as a heavy leather coat. Their loss, while irritating, isn't a tragedy.

The thief didn't even break a window or cause any damage (there's a smudge of black plastic on the passenger door - from a plastic slim jim?) which is a nice touch. You don't often get that kind of professionalism in most smash-and-grabbers nowadays, so I guess it's nice to have been ripped off by somebody who's proud of their craft.

And of course, it's my fault. I shouldn't have left my coat on the front seat, fair enough. I'm still surprised that anybody would want to break into a clearly aged Volvo, but the coat was incentive enough. It might have had something interesting in the pocket. Like a cell phone, f'rinstance.

The last time somebody broke into my car (2 years ago and around 6 blocks south of our present address) it was a far less subtle affair. They rifled the glove compartment, went through the armrest holder, ransacked the pockets on the backs of the seats. Thoroughly disappointed by that time, they left. But not before leaving a twoonie on the back seat. Perhaps they reviewed the age of the car and decided I could use a couple of bucks.

Friday, March 06, 2009

10 Don'ts for John Tory

"'Obviously, I am very disappointed,' Tory, gracious in defeat, told hushed supporters in his concession speech above a Greek restaurant shortly before 11 p.m. 'But the voters can never be wrong in what they decide and I respect their decision.'"

The Toronto Star, March 6th

Gracious indeed. And yet, I still feel compelled to remind Mr. Tory of a few missteps over the last few years:

1. Don’t drop yourself into a riding where the incumbent you’re replacing had over 30yrs of family history.

2. Don’t take a 2 week vacation after losing 1/3rd of your party’s support.

3. Don’t say ‘Maybe I should leave…’ and ‘Oh, what the hell, I’ll stay’ without a suitable pause between the two statements.

4. Don’t get sulky when questioned by the press and your compatriots after #3.

5. Don’t run for Mayor of Toronto again.

6. Don’t assume you can buy your way into office. Yes, others have. And yes, all things considered, you’re much closer to Bill Davis than to Mike Harris, and in saner times that’s a good thing. But there were whispers about Stephen Harper aligning with a Bill Davis model a long time ago (or at least it feels like a long time ago) and look where that’s led us.

7. Don’t get me wrong, John. Anybody who doesn’t want to be the next Mike Harris has a special place in my heart.

8. Don’t forget to write.

9. Don’t take #8 too seriously.

10. Don't blame me if Bill Murdoch calls for a little chat. But hey, now that you've got the time...

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